Here's the 6th suggestion from Oprah's site that every woman should write down:
The most unexpected compliment you ever got.
Compliments. This is an area of discomfort for this empty nester. And it has always been that way.
I do not have any trouble handing out compliments. I do it daily. Multiple times. I only hand them out when they are warranted but I work with so many wonderful folks and our students are so amazing, that I find myself handing out compliments left, right, center and every other way imaginable. This is not difficult.
Accepting a compliment, on the other hand, is not easy for me. I don't like to be acknowledged and I always prefer to be in the background. Behind stage as opposed to center stage. Compliments in my direction make me uncomfortable.
When I am complimented, I say thank you and try to end the conversation ASAP. Inside, I'm dying to move on. I don't want to acknowledge the compliment. I don't want to discuss it further. I don't want to ever again do anything that may cause that person to send another compliment my way.
I know when I've done my best. I know when I'm doing my job well. I know when I've accomplished something. I know when I've had a good idea. I don't want to be singled out and held up as an example. Which is just the thing that happens with some compliments.
Like the cyberbullying newsletter I put out to our parents last year at school. The principal went nuts and sent it out all over the place, I was mentioned in the superintendent's weekly letter and our district superintendent came to a faculty meeting to acknowledge my efforts and make a presentation.
I nearly died.
Unexpected? To say the least! Deserved? No. I wanted our parents to be aware of cyberbullying and so I put it out there. That's it.
I think I just have a problem with being gracious when I don't see the need for the accolade.
Do y'all have trouble accepting compliments? What was your most unexpected one?
Week 51 of 2024
5 hours ago
I think compliments are good and I try to just say thank you.
ReplyDeleteI do the same. Just say thank you. Then it's over and you can move on. :-) I don't like lingering on compliments either. And like you, I do hand out compliments when they are deserved. I think some people are so stingy with praise. Why? It's almost like they think it takes something away from them to praise another person for a job well done.
ReplyDeleteSo many times I read your posts, and think - did I write that? lol. I feel you, Pam. Great post! (heh)
ReplyDeleteCathy- I think they're good too. I just don't want them. LOL
ReplyDeleteJudy- Hopefully it's over with a thank you. Sometimes they go on and on. I agree. There's nothing wrong with a pat on the back for a job well done.
Jessica- LOL Thanks! I feel that I am in good company! :)
I deliver compliments easily but receiving them is very difficult for me.
ReplyDeleteSame here. I try to swallow and just say thanks but I'm still uncomfortable.
DeleteReceiving compliments is very difficult for me, too and I usually say something that I regret as soon as it comes out of my mouth!!
ReplyDeleteThe strangest compliment I received was just a few days ago about my legs and how pretty they are. Ha!! I have always considered them as something I prefer to hide under jeans. Strange.
I usually say something that negates the compliment. I haven't heard a compliment like that in over 30 years. I think I might appreciate that one. LOL
DeleteWe are so much alike. I love to compliment people and I am very honest. Would not say it if it were not true but don't you dare try to compliment me! Wow, that is a very impressive compliment you received and you were definitely worthy of it.
ReplyDeleteNot really, I was just trying to inform our parents. See? I deflect by negating the compliment. Oh well...thank you anyway. :)
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