I will never quite understood why an acronym for being a stay-at-home-mom was created. It's not like this is a new path from which to choose. Mothers have been staying at home to raise their children for centuries. It's not new. Neither is staying at home to provide care for grandchildren.
There was a time when families helped each other out in ways that involved things other than monetary aid. They lent a hand. It seems that there are those who think grandparents staying home and providing care for their grandchildren is a new trend. It's not. However, since I am doing that with my grandlove, I am going to dub myself a SAHGM- Stay At Home GrandMa. That's right. If moms today get an acronym so should grandmas.
Warning, this part is quite opinionated (ok, judgmental): Now, what will this acronym get me? As far as I can tell from the SAHM acronym it gives me nothing but a certain status and the belief that I deserve some sort of trophy. I'm thrilled to be a SAHGM but I'm not sure I'd like being a part of the SAHM team these days. This is a whole new breed, for the most part. These SAHMs seem to be more interested in keeping their own agendas rather than actually raising their children. At least, I've witnessed evidence suggesting this to be the trend around here.
Warning, again: The trend appears to be moms without jobs outside the home having someone else raise their kids while they go out and attend fitness classes and spend money. They either have someone come into their homes to raise the kids or they plop them in daycare. Am I wrong? I thought the idea of staying at home with the kids was to avoid the daycare trap.
I guess Dylan had it right- the times they are a changin'.
Giving attention to your kiddos is one of the most important things about being a SAHM. Or it used to be. If someone is out and about running from store to store and class to coffee shop while their kid is in daycare or home with the nanny, that's not really being a SAHM in the traditional sense of the word. Perhaps that's what we've come to at this point in time.
Of course, there are exceptions to this apparent trend. There are a couple of moms I know personally who do, actually, stay at home and raise their kiddos. They spend time with their children. The ones I know who do have jobs still make every effort to make that time to spend with their children.
I'm not knocking what SAHMs do or saying they don't love their kids. We all have our own ideas about how to raise children. I'm just saying that, if you're not staying home raising the kids but hiring someone else to do it or putting them in daycare even though you do not have a job outside the home, that's not really being a SAHM.
There may those who feel the choice of being a SAHM is archaic. I'm someone who does not feel this way. Maybe the definition of SAHM has changed. If so, fine. But I'm sure glad I did my staying at home as a mom before this happened. And I'm sure glad I'm a SAHGM now. Because this:
Ok, now that I've stirred the pot in this issue: What are your thoughts on today's SAHMs?
Peace, Peeps!
Since I work with lots of working moms and only know a few SAHMs who really do stay at home with their kids (homeschooling, too) I really don't have an opinion on the ones you are referencing. I'm just not "out there" to see it, perhaps.
ReplyDeleteI think I became more aware of it being in the schools. And Molly worked in a day care briefly. I just always thought that staying home raising the kids was a privilege not an opportunity for me to spend my days spending money and being pampered. LOL
DeleteI am also a sahgm although I do not like the name grandma I am a nana so I would be a sahn I guess
ReplyDeleteThat sounds good to me! :)
DeleteDare I step foot into this issue? Times do change but humans are basically the same as we have been for thousands of years. Our environment has certainly changed. We don't need to worry about the crop failing, cow dying and going hungry. Now we need to worry about kids get too much screen time. It wasn't called screen time back when I was kid. The black and white TV was only targeted at toddlers on Saturday morning from what I can remember. What is important is real loving care from your parents. I believe that is the best for bonding and feeling secure in the world. I don't think kids care much about how many comments or likes their FB picture gets. Only their parents and hopefully that is not a big deal with them either. I need to get going before my rant gets going.
ReplyDeleteYes, but step lightly. You know how we women can be. LOL Seriously, rant on! I agree that bonding and feeling secure in the world is of the utmost importance. Around here, I see that young mothers seem to care greatly about social media. I've seen them completely ignore their children while tuned into their digital devices. It's disgusting. I'm not sure what the kids who have moms who do not work at home or outside the home are learning when those moms put their kids into daycare or hire a nanny to raise them. That just seems off to me.
DeleteThis is the first time I have read your blog and I feel a connection to you.
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's because I was a stay at home mom and now that my kids are in school, I am now a part time SAHM who works from home when they are at school.
I have my foot in both worlds now and it is weird. My oldest daughter goes to college in a year and a half and I am dreading it with all of my being.
I don't understand why you would have children if you don't like to spend time with them which is why we sacrificed in order to be home.
But I know the moms that you speak of; they are in my life and it makes me want to shake them and say THEY GROW UP, YOU KNOW!
Glad I found you this gloomy Saturday morning in Chicago.
I'm so glad you came by! Hang in there. It will be an adjustment when they leave but it's not bad. You miss them like crazy but truly appreciated the times they come home. Family gatherings will be that much more fun and meaningful. I don't understand why these moms don't spend time with their kids. Kids are so great and such a blessing. And they do, indeed, grow up. And FAST! Thank you so much for visiting and commenting!
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