I'm asking for a friend.
Because of my strong aversion to it, I try very hard not to give out unsolicited advice. If everyone is sitting around discussing a topic and sharing opinions then, yes I'll throw my two cents worth in the mix. I'll certainly give a response if someone asks my advice or opinion and I am never afraid to respond with an 'I don't know.' But I work hard to keep my big, fat trap shut when my thoughts are not sought out.
Oh yes, I fail miserably from time to time but I believe, if you ask the lovelies, I am pretty good at not throwing my weight around with my own opinions. Comparatively speaking.
I wonder if this is why phrases like this are created:
It's not like we don't know how to raise kids. We do. Whether we helped raise younger siblings or other relatives, babysat from the time we were 12 years old or had our own children, most of us probably have at least an inkling of how to raise kids.
But with time, everything changes. According to the 'experts'. Moms are reading everything they can get their hands on these days so they can have the BEST kids. The smartest ones. No one seems to care that much about the kids being happy and enjoying their childhood anymore. No one seems to care whether their kids have manners or common courtesies or respect for themselves, others, living creatures, the Earth... Let's just raise them to be the SMARTEST. To be the one that EXCELS and gains recognition. Please don't even get me started on today's pediatricians.
I'm glad my daughter does not read all the books or follow all the current 'rules' for raising a child. I'm glad she tunes into her natural instincts. Because, if the parents are going to be catering to the kids' every whim, what's left for grandparents? That my dears is a grandparents job.
So, when do you put your daughter (or son) on a need-to-know when it comes to things you do for and with your grandchildren? I'm not sure when the actual time is so I started now. I almost made it to the 8-month mark, but not quite. No, I can't give you specifics because what if Baby M's mommy or daddy read this post? I'm not worried about her aunties because, and this is a BIG secret, they have her parents on a need-to-know, too.
Need-to-know is a wonderful thing for grandparents and aunties. It keeps us out of trouble and no one gets upset. I'm sure Baby M won't mind playing along. I mean, there's no use biting the hand or looking a gift horse in the mouth.
Are the parents of your grandloves on need-to-know?\
Oh, I'm definitely on the need to know brigade! 😂 Mind you, my girls and I are pretty much on the same wavelength anyway! I agree totally about the manners bit. Last year., both Eli and Ruby's school report said how well mannered they were, and how kind they were to the other children. Now, of course I was thrilled that their reading and writing was going so well, but I told my daughter that the comments about manners and kindness meant more than anything to me 😊
ReplyDeleteBaby M's mom and I are on the same wavelength, too. For the most part. She's a little strict about some things, however that I think are fine to do. LOL Yes! Kindness and manners go a long way, don't they? I feel the same way. My parents were like that as well. I brought home straight As but if my deportment grade was not the same, I was in trouble. :) Thank you, Diane!
Delete😊😊
DeleteHaven't had much cause to come up against this yet. But I'm pretty sure I'd be on the need to know side. 😉
ReplyDeleteI bet you will. I think it's something that just can't be helped. LOL Have a great weekend!
DeleteDefinitely on the what happens at Grammas stays here. If it's a life threatening situation then I'd share. Sort of what I told my kids when tattling on another. Unless keeping the info would lead to harm of someone I don't need to know. That's how I was raised. I'm also on the kindness and good manners team!
ReplyDeleteBaby M is growing so fast, and a real doll baby! 💗
I agree. If it's something big then, yes. But giving her Puffs before her mother wants her to have them, oh well. LOL She really is growing too fast. She thinks she should be able to walk already. Which is keeping me on my toes. :)
DeleteOh completely!!! I am not ever telling on them. Not to mention I see things more clearly than as a Mom. Things just aren't such a big deal. I want them to know that there is a place like Grandma's house. My grandparents never breathed a word to my parents, so I always felt free to tell them everything. I think kids need a place in their life like that. Grandma's house needs to be magical. Just like at my grandparents house. My kids still talk about my grandparents as being the best in the whole world. Even though they were their great grandparents.
ReplyDeleteExactly! My grandparent's house was my favorite place and I want Marcy to feel the same about my house. :) Thanks, Kim!
DeleteLOL!! Of course they are...and our Grands are in their 20s now!!
ReplyDeleteOh yes! I expect it will never end. :)
DeleteHell yes if I don't think they need to know, I don't tell them, if I let the grandchild have ice cream for breakfast once in a while they don't need to know just saying
ReplyDeleteHahahaha! Agreed!
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