Most of you might remember that Mother lived with me for 4 months last year, and we got her right back to her independent state, and she was able to go back home, which is what she wanted to do. In the last month, and particularly the last few weeks, her health decided to decline and on Wednesday, May 9, 2018 she was called home. We celebrated her life yesterday and got smacked in the face with Mother's Day today.
Not exactly the way we wanted to spend Mother's Day weekend. Not even close.
Instead of focusing on the sad side I want to share the upside of the weekend, because there were upsides and because that's the way she would have wanted this post to go.
The upsides of saying goodbye on Mother's Day weekend:
- The reminiscing. And did we ever reminisce. For hours. Talk about something being therapeutic goodness but that's exactly what all our reminiscing did for us. It didn't matter if a tale someone told was one we'd heard one thousand times before we laughed like it was the first time. We remembered and shared and laughed til we cried tears of joy/sorrow if you know what I mean. Mostly joyful tears because we got to be her family.
- Family members reunited. How does it happen sometimes that family members become estranged? I don't know, life happens and BAM. Yes, it's sad it takes something like this to bring folks around but instead of focusing on the why we chose to focus on the joy of the reconnecting. And now those who have drifted away are back in the fold.
- Visiting with extended family. Have I mentioned that Mother's side of the family is rather large? I've written about our family reunions in the past but a family funeral is almost like a family reunion because everyone who can come, comes and we talk and share tales and laugh like crazy people and we surround one another the kind of love I would hate to have lived my life without. Mother LOVED that extended family and they LOVED her. So do we. Family is better than anything. Even when they're crazy. Which we are but we like it that way.
- You realize it's not the day but the times that make life special and dear and you are extremely grateful for the time you were allowed to have with your mother and even though she's gone she instilled life lessons to get you through in good times and bad.
Mother (left) and Aunt Betty |
Mother and me |
So sorry to read of your loss, Pam. Thoughts and prayers are with you at this sad time. I’m sure you will always speak of Mimi with much love, fond memories, and, yes, laughter. I hope it was peaceful at the end, Pam ❤️
ReplyDeleteThank you, Diane. We're back home now and everything is a bit too quiet. It was peaceful for her in the end and we're all grateful for that.
DeleteI know your hearts are full of love and also sadness right now. Wish I could pop in and give you a hug, Pam. Keep on remembering. I know you will.
ReplyDeleteI wish you could, too. :) Thank you, Terri.
DeletePam, I am so sorry to hear about your mother's passing. My thoughts and prayers are with your family. ((Hugs)) Thank you for sharing the lovely photos.
ReplyDeleteThank you. We really thought she was going to rally back and be able to go back home but that just didn't happen.
DeleteMy heart hurts and I am so glad you have the girls around you. In spite of it all I hope you have a lovely day.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Kim. It certainly did help to have all the girls around but now it's a bit too quiet. We did enjoy being all together and had a nice time on Mother's Day with promises of a better time next year. :)
DeleteSending oh so much love to you and yours. I see where the strong love of family and nurturing comes from. Hold close to your memories and all those dear Lovelies. Holding you in my heart dear one.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much. Even though the reason was sad having everyone together made it so much easier to handle.
DeleteNo time is a good time to lose a parent, especially when one is close to their parent I know one day it will happen but I hope it is a long way off. I hope you are all coping ok with your loss
ReplyDeleteSo true. We're a very close family and this only brought us closer thankfully. I'm not sure how I'd handle this without the closeness we share.
DeleteI am so sorry Pam. I’ll be praying for you and your family.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Cathy. I really appreciate the prayers. :)
DeleteWishing you and your family comfort and strength in this sad time.
ReplyDeleteI very much like this line you wrote: "And she most definitely would have enjoyed our laughter because tears are to be shed for only a moment and laughter every day."
We all need laughs.
Thank you. Things are a bit overwhelming right now but I'm sure we'll make it through. WE do need laughs. :)
DeleteThere is no greater gain than the memories that spill forth in our tears. In your sadness lies the string of words that saunter through your grief, that pat you on the shoulder to say she is still with you, and that allow the first hint of laughter after the hurt. She is proud of the strong women you have added to this mixed up world, just as she sent you forth into the world to do what good you have done. I will always remember the too-short afternoon when you took me to meet her; her intellect humbled an arrogant young man and taught him ways to be better and to treat women better. That lesson lives on in me, and I join you in missing her.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Ron. You are a shining light in my world. I'm grateful for you every single day.
DeleteI am so very sorry to hear of your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers and if we lived closer, I'd bring you a casserole . . .such a southern thing to do!
ReplyDeleteIt is a southern thing to do and people have been doing just that. :) Thank you!
DeleteI am sorry for your loss, Pam. And yes, sometimes it takes something major like that to reunite a family. I too love having all the kids and grandkids around me. I would hope that every mom would. xo
ReplyDeleteThank you, Judy. I would hope every mom loves having them around, too.
DeleteSo sorry Pam ♥ I've seen the loss of a loved one bring "long lost" or "mad at each other" family members back together. I'm glad you have your girls and grandbabies ♥
ReplyDelete